Defective Thoughts VIRAL?!

I have heard some suspicious news from two of my bestie's (642, and Dr. BLT), that when they opened BLOGIT, their computer opened multiple windows of the page! Has anyone else had this problem? I can assure you that its impossible for a blogspot page to give you any kind of virus, but I am no techy.. I did recieve a C- in computer science, which I am pretty sure led to me planning a "passing party!"


Lets hope this small glitch doesnt interfere with the frequency of their visits to the site.. it wouldn't be the same without you two party animals!

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Guest Blogger: Triceratops

Once again, one of my biggest fans 'Triceratops' has taken a stab at some blogging of her own. She graced these e-pages a few days back, blogging about the conditions of her employment, and now she is back with the next edition. As previously mentioned, if you think you can pen an awesome posting, send it my way!

Old Man Rejection
Since my last blog I've put some thought into my life. I thought long and hard about all those ancient gentlemen who have pursued me over the course of my retail career. Those dedicated, persistent, thoughtful, admiring, and yes a little creepy grandpas who have tried their luck with me over the years. It occurred to me that all these qualities are things I look for in a man, minus the creep factor of course- but I'm sure that only develops after the age of 40. SO, if I managed to find an older man UNDER 40 he'd be everything I'd ever need!

Find him I did, a 35 year old mediocre looking, and likely desperate coffee shop owner Teq. Teq seemed to have all those great old person qualities I was looking for- plus he had yet to develop that 40+ creep factor. The love gods had smiled upon me. We had one of those magical first dates where the booze flows freely (on his tab), the conversation is stimulating (except the part where he told a crazy ex girlfriend story... Awkward), we lost total track of time and closed down the restaurant. I even managed to ignore the fact that he was a little on the short side and had a definite gay straight man vibe.I was looking into his inner self and ignoring those superficial types of things... Plus I'd had a few cocktails. The date ended with a romantic restaurant booth kiss followed by a good solid "goodnight" makeout. YES! I cheered to myself.. Old but not TOO old! This fits just right! YES! I cheered louder the next day when he called to arrange another date. A 2.5 week romance developed between this older gentleman and myself.. Until of course the inevitable happened.. My old man rejection. Old like his younger counterparts pulled the ever so subtle cease of communication followed by the really believable " you're and awesome girl but my life is insane right now, I need to focus on me." BUDDY YOU ARE OLD! You've had 35 years to focus on "you".. I'm not falling for it! Despite this pathetic cop out I remained positive. My experience tells me that behind one of man lurks another. My next older thing was not far behind! Things were fine and dandy until I received the dreaded facebook delete. How DARE he!?!? Not seeing me anymore is one thing but a facebook delete is a whole new level of rejection I was not prepared for. I can't lie.. It stings a bit. My newest old man experience has left me burnt and slightly desperate. How the tables have turned.

My advice for all you young readers is this: don't mess with old people. They have decades of experience and can sucker punch you WAM! and leave you with one less facebook friend.


Desperately yours,
Triceratops

Up For Auction

For this installment of "the contents of my art portfolio" circa 2006, I reveal my third most popular piece. This was one of my first masterpieces, and it most definitely caused a stir amongst my disturbingly eager art enthusiasts. Except of course when we had a live model one lesson, and I made her look like a robot having a mechanical malfunction. For this assignment, we were given "creative control" over what we wanted to produce, as long as it was an enlarged representation of a clipping from a magazine. Being incredibly low on resources and ambition, I vaguely remember madly flipping through a National Geographic magazine the night before my work was up for critique. I stumbled across an article about 'llama farming' and was quite interested in recreating the llama's, hoping it would show 'originality' and 'creativity', and of course to show I was up for the challenge of drawing this awkward creature, instead of something pedestrian, like a dog. However, the only thing that was awkward, was when I pinned this gem up on the wall of our art class, and taped the little original scrap of paper next to it. I remember fondly as my classmates eyes lit up as they gazed upon my beautiful creation. In contrast to the rage that filled my professors. Once again I had taken the 'cartoon approach' she so often told me to 'try to stray' from, and little did she know, I never would. When the class was asked which one they liked the best, I remember the majority selected mine. However this could potentially have been out of pity, but to be honest, it was a ray of light in comparison to the often depressing garble that the other students spent 2 weeks on. I remember giving my art teacher a "I own this classroom" smirk during this, which likely had a direct affect on my final grade.


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Name That Face!

Which two "always scandalous" Rosedale Residents were seen partying hard over the weekend, in these fantastic "costumes"? Many mentioned that they were completely out of control, so lets hope they recovered today! And No, its not DT Regular, 642..


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Did You See?

Sunnysides newest resident, take her relentless partying ways to Banff this week and let loose with her fellow coworkers? She was seen sprinting from one fantastic establishment to another up until 5am, when she eventually gave into the temptation of sleep. Lets hope she has completely nursed herself back into tip-top shape! We all know its impossible not to have a blast in the funnest location in the country!


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Poor Emily

I have been house sitting all this week, and I was rudely awoken early this morning by a string of phone calls from a desperate youth clearly on a mission to sort out her life. I managed to ignore the first two phone calls which were pulsating through the home, but decided it might be in my best interest to answer the third one, just in case it was the neighbors trying to get in contact with the person taking refuge in the house, to complain about my lack of snow shoveling etiquette. "Hello?" I asked. I tried to use my "confused as to why this person insisted on calling the house three times within 10 minutes" voice. "Oh Hello, this is Emily returning Brenda's phone call." I was so annoyed, let slightly relieved that this was all just a misunderstanding, and that I could now sleep peacefully knowing there wasn't a community witch hunt out for me. "You most definitely have the wrong number" I insisted, holding back my questions as to why she didn't get the hint the first two times that this might not be the right place. "Oh.. Is this the University of Calgary admissions office? I am returning Brenda's phone call." I instantly put two and two together to realize why this nut case had so much energy at this hour. I too placed all kinds of energized phone calls to the University some five years ago around this time, pestering the poor souls on the receiving end to enroll me. "I may have got 51% in Math 30, but my average is still 0.4% above the minimum requirement" is what I believe my argument was. I explained that I was not the admissions office at the University, and held back from telling her to turn and run from post-secondary, and start up a career at Blockbuster. Instead of apologizing, for electronically abusing my telephone lines, she quickly asked what number she had called instead. This is when I felt stupid, because I had no idea what number she had called.. all I knew was that she woke me up, and I was tired. "Umm to be honest I don't know this phone number" I casually explained, as if it wasn't weird that I didn't know my own phone number. I am pretty sure at this point paranoia set in, and poor Emily started to believe that she had been rejected from the University of Calgary, and this was their way of getting rid of her. She finally let me go, and I went back to sleep. Not 1 minute later the phone was ringing again, and I saw Emily's name on the caller ID. "Hello again" I muttered, this time in my livid voice. "Oh my gosh, did I call you again?" At this moment I wanted to tell her that she was hopeless to get into any University with her phone number comprehension and button pushing skills. I tossed the phone into my hamper in hopes my cloths would muffle the sounds of her likely imminent fifth phone call. Thankfully her brain started to function and she either dialed Brenda correctly, or simply came to the same conclusion in regards to her future in the academic world as I did.

I was further plagued by this Emily monster when I finished up my house sitting stint tonight, and upon unpacking my things at home, I found the family's portable phone stuffed into my hamper. Last time I stayed there I accidentally took home one of their TV remotes, so I am sure they will be completely weirded out when I have to drop by their home tomorrow and give back the other small appliance that I swiped. Its like I am a clepto with a nagging conscious, the perfect kind.


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Where In The World?

Thanks to technology, I can now view where all you fans are accessing this fantastic blog from.. and thought you might be interested to see who else in the World is hitting up BLOGIT!


I think we all know who that one little dot in Paris belongs too! Hope your laughing hard JM! xoxo

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